aproclivity

Oh fuckohfuckohfuck. So, I have been operating on the assumption that I would just be able to take this test and like... NOT need to fucking take a language, being as I have had four attempts (not counting German) to try and learn a language and my brain just isn't processing them. I don't know why, but with the amount of fucking time I put in, it should have. Fuck.

So, I finally emailed Jon Body about doing that, and this is what I got in return:

Kim,
I'm sorry to hear you have struggled with foreign language learning. We actually don't
have a waiver for the language distribution. However is a student is diagnosed with a
learning disability which significantly interferes with her ability to learn a foreign
language, she can request a foreign language substitution under the American's with
Disabilties Act. This substitution allows the student to either take the language
courses with the ungraded option (pass/fail) and still count towards distribution; or the
student can take two culture courses in on cultural area. These culture courses cannot
count towards any other distribution or major or minor requirements.
Have you been diagnosed with a learning disability?
The first step in the process whether you have been diagnosed with an LD or not is to
take the Modern Language Aptitude Test through my office. The test cannot diagnose
anything, its only a screening tool but it does give us good information on how a student
processes language. If you would like to take the MLAT (it takes about an hour and a
half), please email my intern, Lauren Tornatore who is included in this email, times that
you are available on Monday and Tuesday afternoons.

John Body

Uh... yeah. So this is me, doubly fucked. Fuck. Fuckfuckfuck. I don't know what I'm gonna do. Oi. Of course this would have to come the day after declaring my major. Which I now need to fucking undeclare cause I was thinking I would be able to kill two birds with one stone. Oi, Moho finding new and interesting ways to fuck me over. God. What do I do? Fuck.

I am officially a politics major with a new adviser. Somehow it feels...awesome.

The fucking heat is so loud and my ipod cord is broken. Sigh.

So yeah, I heard a hissing and got all excited cause I thought that they'd turned on the fucking heat in my room and shit but it was just someone in the shower. Damn it. I'm so cold. And every time I listen to this song I hear "Lorna Fields is addicted to the knife." Thanks, Bri.

Despite studying all night...I'm pretty sure I'm gonna fail this test. Sigh.

So, tomorrow I will be a politics major. I'm down with it, three 300 classes in the next three semester. One three hundred level for my English minor. Annnnd I can turn any 200 level to a 300 level by getting the professor to let me write an extra paper. Woohoo. Excited and happy. Thank goodness. Also, I'm not the only stupid person in my Italian class. No one else can remember all the verbs either!

Oh my gods, so much loud fucking planes. Go away airshow! Don't you know some of us had early fucking classes?

Ouch. $480 for books and I still need to get five more. Ironic that Chinese is half the cost of the Italian book.

So yeah, slowly coming to the realization that an empty laptop means a new beginning, and that it needs filling up, like a lot of stuff at this point. I'm 29 now, which is probably the first time I've been able to type those words without wanting to go find a razor and start carving the years off. I'm also starting to realize I can do this. Reading Trina's awesome post about graduation at MH and everything else it entails (and the conversation earlier) reminded me why I wanted to go to Moho in the first place, and it gives me faith I can get through it. Right now I have like a 3.7 GPA cause the Dean withdrew me from one of my classes so I don't have an F for the fucking James course, and I can get through the rest of it. I am not alone in this, no matter how I may feel about it.

I'm a grown up, and I'm learning to be better at it. And in 2 years I'll have my degree, and I'll be able to go whereever I want with it. Maybe it won't be like I planned, maybe I won't be like I planned...but I'll be able to get through it.

<3s.

So, I can't sleep and have been trying off and on since this afternoon. I realize now why it is. First of all, I don't wanna go home, and second of all, with nothing on my walls, my room looks more then a little like a mental institution. Creepy. But I'll probably stay here tonight anyway. We'll see.